| Golden Axe: Beast Rider |
| Posted on 6th November 2008 by John Keating |
No one likes to shatter childlike innocence, great memories and nostalgic warmth. No one with a heart and moral fibre that is and that's something that seems to be lacking at evil old Uncle Sega in recent times. After mediocre releases of Viking, Superstar Tennis and the intolerable convoluted Sonic 360, Sega are back with another franchise to bastardise. Golden Axe: Beast Rider is a lesson in lackluster and the banal. Offering nothing innovative or polished, this latest version has lost all of the charm and multiplayer fun of the original leaving behind a mindless hack and slash yarn that leaves you cutting your losses and working out what the possible trade in value is. Look out for Sega's new seasonal advertising campaign with catchy slogan "Buy Sega kids. PS - Santa's your dad".
The best aspects of the old game have not been reprised for this next gen update, in fact they have been completely avoided. Possibly the greatest joy to be had with the original was the co-op play that was so popular at the time. Along with the likes of Double Dragon, Golden Axe led the way in multiplayer side scrolling action asking you to search and destroy the mighty Death Adder and his naughty minions. No other experience allowed you, as a playable dwarf, to bludgeon gnomes for chicken or call upon lightning strikes when the crap hit the fan. Of course such a mix was a sure fire recipe for commercial and critical success and rightly so. In the original, the wee man Gillius was not alone and hung out with a couple of chums that helped out along the way; The big Arnie bloke and the Red Sonja type chick. Instead of building on this solid tri-character foundation, Sega have plumped for a solo outing casting the player as Tyris Flare, the red haired siren who has all the charisma of a Games Master contestant .
The first thing that hits you when playing this game is complete lack of sparkle, pizzazz or creativity within the environments. Pencilled from a very neutral palette, there is a fantastic display of beige, champagnes, creams, mocha, latte browns and other scandalously mundane colours. Its not a million miles away to say that this game very much resembles an effort late in the original Xbox's lifespan especially when looking at the player model. This prosaic theme stretches from the visual style to the characters and enemies that you face. Standard goons with swords and axes litter the battlefield and come at you from all angles. These faceless bandits will just wade in with seemingly little thought for tactics and strategy. At times, so disgusted with the sandy unimaginative world that they inhabit, they will turn their back on you and just stand there whilst you hack them up, bringing the accelerated end to their miserable existence that they crave. Come on Sega - surely you must have foreseen that this is not up to par? Are we as a collective audience viewed with so much disdain and arrogance that you think we wouldn't notice or care? Tut tut indeed.
Supposedly central to the gameplay of this franchise are the Beasts from the title. Throughout your travels through the desolate plains, you will chance upon cumbersome dinosaur ilk beasts that you can ride but are simply painful to control. Once you realise, that they are in fact a royal pain in the Axe then you will soon dismount and go back to moving about on foot. Feeling like a footnote to the entire game, their best use is to bash through wooden gates and charge barriers that are impassable to our flame haired warrior alone. There is a special move assigned to each beast but inexplicably, the developers decided to employ a mechanic that kills off the beast if you use it, a little bit like a bee with its pointless sting. Again, this is to the detriment of playability and is another piece of poor form.
Luckily for us then, you can if you wish, progress through the majority of the game without the help of Dino and his pals. Unluckily for us is that the main character is equally as graceless and awkward as the titular beasts. Tyris mainly relies on her sword to get her through the most tricky situations and is frequently mobbed by many an adversary. The key to moving forward is mastering a blocking and parrying move which is made challenging by a colour coded system. If the backswing of your foes thrust is blue, the use the right bumper, if orange the left bumper and so on. At first, it all seems rather pointless and frustrating but it adds a little something and is a fair crack at pushing the game on and keeps button bashers at bay. It's a mild positive at best but worth a mention just so I don't feel like I am constantly stamping on a puppy with my continual negative comments.
As well as the gory swordplay action, the magic from the original is still in check and subsidised by the gnomes that just keep on giving. Knocking these pesky little creatures on the bounce will result in them dropping a potion that will restock your magic allocation. Spells range from the humdrum fireball to the slightly less routine fire blasts, but solace can be found far later in the adventure with new abilities being unlocked by using the Golden Axe itself that shows more advanced magical techniques.
Beast Rider is a depressing title that could have been so much more. With Sega once being a kite mark for quality, it's further evidence to suggest that the days of the 16bit genius are well and truly behind them. Being generous, this is a technically average title with standard hack and slashes gameplay. With the likes of Ninja Gaiden and DMC all packing superior product and half the price tag, there can be little justification for picking this up. If you love your gore and swords then rent first, otherwise avoid completely. A Beast? Maybe, but definitely pony. |
Single Player Score: 3/10
Multiplayer Score: 0/10
Overall Score: 3/10 |
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